25-12-2022, 12:33 PM
Dom Knight's Christmas Cracker Jokes
What’s Scott Morrison’s favourite British comedy series?
[b]Yes Ministries![/b]
What did they serve instead of beer at the Qatar World Cup?
[b]Budweiser![/b]
What happened when the Bureau of Meteorology tried to change its nickname?
[b]They BoMbed![/b]
Which Hollywood star had the most watched hit of 2022?
[b]Will Smith![/b]
How did the three wise mobsters launder money at Christmas?
[b]They looked for The Star![/b]
How do you get into Mar-a-Lago without paying $200,000 to join?
[b]A search warrant![/b]
What happens when Greens MPs get together for a joke?
[b]Bandter![/b]
Why did Harry and Meghan make a documentary for Netflix?
[b]Because Sus-sex sells![/b]
What’s Simon Holmes A Court’s favourite takeaway order?
[b]A teal deal![/b]
Which seabird would rather travel by fast train than fly?
[b]An Albotross[/b]
What’s the difference between Santa Claus and Peter Dutton?
[b]One lives at the North Pole; the other’s polls have gone south![/b]
What’ll the immunisation policy be at next year’s Australian Open?
[b]They’ll allow Novaks![/b]
Why did the Victorian Liberals look for a new leader who doesn’t blink?
[b]Because Dan Andrews’ biggest vulnerability is stairs![/b]
What’s the one card NSW Labor won’t send anyone this Christmas?
[b]A cashless gaming card![/b]
What did the AFP call its dossier on George Christensen?
[b]The Manila Folder![/b]
hat did the volunteer flood rescuers in Lismore have, and deserve a lot more of?
[b]Tinnies![/b]
On election day, what happened to the Coalition’s vote in Warringah?
[b]It was Deves-tated![/b]
hat’s the easiest way to get yourself onto the internet in 2022?
[b]Be an Optus customer![/b]
Who lost the Victorian election?
[b]Some Guy![/b]
Why shouldn’t you play Cluedo against Brian Houston?
[b]He won’t tell anyone that the Reverend did it![/b]
Which economic indicator did Josh Frydenberg lower significantly, then increase by one?
[b]The unemployment rate![/b]
What’s riskier than self-driving mode on a Tesla?
[b]Putting Elon Musk at the wheel![/b]
Why did David Littleproud address his party room in mime?
[b]Because he’s opposed to the Voice![/b]
What’s the least popular festive food in Ukraine this year?
[b]Christmas Putin![/b]
What do you call a festive gathering that ends early because the host’s over it?
[b]A Barty party![/b]
What did Scott Morrison destroy during the election campaign?
[b]Would have accepted “the Coalition’s primary vote” or “[i]April Sun In Cuba”[/i]![/b]
Why did Medibank Private change its name to just plain Medibank?
[b]They can’t keep anything private![/b]
What will FTX founder Sam Bankman-Fried do in the new year?
[b]Time![/b]
What’s Scott Morrison’s favourite British comedy series?
[b]Yes Ministries![/b]
What did they serve instead of beer at the Qatar World Cup?
[b]Budweiser![/b]
What happened when the Bureau of Meteorology tried to change its nickname?
[b]They BoMbed![/b]
Which Hollywood star had the most watched hit of 2022?
[b]Will Smith![/b]
How did the three wise mobsters launder money at Christmas?
[b]They looked for The Star![/b]
How do you get into Mar-a-Lago without paying $200,000 to join?
[b]A search warrant![/b]
What happens when Greens MPs get together for a joke?
[b]Bandter![/b]
Why did Harry and Meghan make a documentary for Netflix?
[b]Because Sus-sex sells![/b]
What’s Simon Holmes A Court’s favourite takeaway order?
[b]A teal deal![/b]
Which seabird would rather travel by fast train than fly?
[b]An Albotross[/b]
What’s the difference between Santa Claus and Peter Dutton?
[b]One lives at the North Pole; the other’s polls have gone south![/b]
What’ll the immunisation policy be at next year’s Australian Open?
[b]They’ll allow Novaks![/b]
Why did the Victorian Liberals look for a new leader who doesn’t blink?
[b]Because Dan Andrews’ biggest vulnerability is stairs![/b]
What’s the one card NSW Labor won’t send anyone this Christmas?
[b]A cashless gaming card![/b]
What did the AFP call its dossier on George Christensen?
[b]The Manila Folder![/b]
hat did the volunteer flood rescuers in Lismore have, and deserve a lot more of?
[b]Tinnies![/b]
On election day, what happened to the Coalition’s vote in Warringah?
[b]It was Deves-tated![/b]
hat’s the easiest way to get yourself onto the internet in 2022?
[b]Be an Optus customer![/b]
Who lost the Victorian election?
[b]Some Guy![/b]
Why shouldn’t you play Cluedo against Brian Houston?
[b]He won’t tell anyone that the Reverend did it![/b]
Which economic indicator did Josh Frydenberg lower significantly, then increase by one?
[b]The unemployment rate![/b]
What’s riskier than self-driving mode on a Tesla?
[b]Putting Elon Musk at the wheel![/b]
Why did David Littleproud address his party room in mime?
[b]Because he’s opposed to the Voice![/b]
What’s the least popular festive food in Ukraine this year?
[b]Christmas Putin![/b]
What do you call a festive gathering that ends early because the host’s over it?
[b]A Barty party![/b]
What did Scott Morrison destroy during the election campaign?
[b]Would have accepted “the Coalition’s primary vote” or “[i]April Sun In Cuba”[/i]![/b]
Why did Medibank Private change its name to just plain Medibank?
[b]They can’t keep anything private![/b]
What will FTX founder Sam Bankman-Fried do in the new year?
[b]Time![/b]